After years of hard work, when do you know when it is truly the time to settle down? Just as an opinion, settling down can be relative to different people. Some would want to settle down early, and others want to wait until they are older and wiser. However, only one thing remains constant, and that is when they feel like they are ready.
So, how do would you know when you are ready? How would you know when to look for a residential property for sale and commit to family life? This article will not try to give you the answer, but this will help you arrive at one.
If you have clicked on this article, chances are the thought of settling down has crossed your mind. Or perhaps, you are being told to do so by your family and peers. Regardless, it is going to be up to you.
Here are the things you need to consider finding out when it is time:
Your Habits and Tendencies
There are studies that say that it takes longer for men to mature than women, and this first item is for our male readers. It is also one way to say “when you have grown up”.
See, men tend to have different habits that go against settling down. Men like to chill and have fun and leave the responsibilities to women. While there is nothing wrong with hanging out with your bros after work, you should be aware that settling down means you are now responsible for your family and not just your own whims.
If you still feel like your bachelor’s privileges are too precious to give up, then it is probably not yet time to settle down. “But it marriage isn’t supposed to be a life-shackling experience!” It isn’t, and if you would feel that way, then something is definitely wrong.
In general, settling down means having a family, raising your kids, and being there for your partner in life until you grow old. These things would become your responsibility for all the years to come, it is not something you can leave the majority to your partner to deal with.
Your Emotional Stability
The second one on our list is one of the most overlooked aspects of settling down, marriage, and even adulting. They say life is how we make it. It is 10% of the universe, and 90% of us. It is akin to what humans are made of to face the endless problems life would give us.
Before you settle down, check on how you are with this. How do you deal with life? How do you deal with problems? How are you as a person? Are you aware of your communication style, parenting style, coping mechanism, and even your unhealthy habits? See, the last one is not something that anyone can shake off just like that. However, if you are to become a parent, being aware and stable as a person would greatly affect how your children grow up.
Furthermore, if you still have unaddressed problems and unhealed traumas as a kid, you might accidentally pass it on to your kids, and them to theirs. Just think of that. Parenting is not and should not be something that you would just wing it and learn on the fly. Well, it is something like that, but when you are a parent, you need to be a stable and healthy individual if you want to become a good parent yourself.
Your Compatibility with Your Partner
The last thing on our list is something most people do not really consider, but the consistent divorce rate in the country suggests otherwise. Yes, you were in love, and the person seemed to be perfect and flawless in your eyes years ago. However, chemistry is not everything in a relationship. Love is not something that can hold a marriage’s foundation alone, you need to have a mutual understanding of each other’s beliefs, values, and past. If these things are not aligned, even if the relationship is not completely toxic, then you need to consider working it out first before you settle down.
Working it out a year after you have kids together can only put a heavier toll on the relationship. Things would build up, and your kids would remember their childhood with a dysfunctional family. No one wants that for anyone. So, before you settle down, ask yourself if you are truly compatible with the person. After all, there would be vows that need to be upheld when the time comes.
Settling down is almost the beginning of the end. It is the first few pages of your last chapter, and getting it wrong would be too much work again. Not to mention, you could affect other people’s lives in the process. It is something you need to think about long and hard before doing so if you don’t want any regrets in the future.